I appreciate your suggestion, but I'd hoped there was a better solution. I'll keep it as a last resort though.

I have no problem with compiling into C, when I said I didn't like it, I meant for coding. If the code produced by perlcc compiled by me just typing:

gcc -I /include/path/ whatever.pl.c -o mybinary.exe

then I'd be very happy. But I get compiler errors. Perlcc does not even appear to be writing syntactically valid code!