1. explicit clarity of intent

I have that on the LHS.

2. 3 parameterizable output methods
3. 3 methods which can be re-used or overloaded as needed
4. The ability to call all 3 output methods, none or any combination simply by mixing/matching method calls.

No call for those, since that doesn't gain me anything.

You missed my point. Context awareness is a key concept of Perl. Deprecating context awareness with regard to subroutine return is tantamount to crippling the language.

Try Date::localtime

No such module... ;-)

_($_=" "x(1<<5)."?\n".q·/)Oo.  G°\        /
                              /\_¯/(q    /
----------------------------  \__(m.====·.(_("always off the crowd"))."·
");sub _{s./.($e="'Itrs `mnsgdq Gdbj O`qkdq")=~y/"-y/#-z/;$e.e && print}