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I think most people would be very irritated by /msg responses to every downvote actually. Whenever I get downvoted, it's usually pretty clear why it's happening. I can either live with -5 rep (probably the worst of it unless it was a monkdiscuss) or fix it, but the feedback usually isn't necessary.
To me, it's generally not: again, I can live with it. Though in my first days here it would get on my nerves. Well, it still does occasionally: but it really depends on the actual node. For example my most recent one with a negative reputation is one which I saw going up and down before setting on the current -2. I can understand why it is so -although I obviously disagree-: because it is not politically correct. Had it been, I'm sure it would have been better received, yet, if everything were PC all the time world would be a more boring place, so I accept those downvotes gladly - because it had not to be PC.
OTOH the next most recent downvoted node of mine is one which merely contains technical information, adding to a context where the particular issue had not been mentioned at all. So it's natural to feel like: hey, why that -1 if it adds to knowledge in a manner pertaining to the thread? Well, these are just examples, after all...
I'm with you though. I just don't use downvotes very often. You have to really earn a downvote for me to give it. I think most people are that way because they've felt the sting of the downvote before.
As sensible to downvotes as I may have given the impression to be with the above, I must admit, contrary to to what most people profess, that I downvote quite often. In fact my visits to the Monastery often start with Worst Nodes. Why?
- Sometimes you can find there good nodes that were downvoted for some unexplicable reason, and if I can correct the situation, I will happily spend my votes to do so;
- most often, the downvoted nodes deserve having been: then I will follow the thread, possibly answering myself if I can add something useful both for the OP and for the others reading it.
In fact, surprising as it may be, often good threads get out of poorly asked questions, and OTOH following e.g. Best Nodes would form the basis for a bias towards them, possibly obscuring other precious contributions. Anyway I downvote freely and without feeling guilty: it's not the overall brightness (or dimness) that matters, but contrast - as Dan Sugalski put it:
Professional courtesy is fine and all, but if you're running a project, with volunteer labor or not, sometimes you need to tell people to suck it up and deal.
Well, here it's not a matter of running a project or of professionalism, but it seems to me that the same principle applies.
Oh, and when I downvote I generally don't feel compelled to explain why, especially if other people already did or at least gave some clue: no point in further polluting a thread, so in this particular case I agree anyway with the OP that a quick feedback mechanism could be useful... but:
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