Negotiation is the process of finding talking points and common grounds where the're room for give and take.

• To you, it might be advantageous if you can start with two weeks of vacation available to use without waiting a year. But that's a visible thing, that other employees will see and grumble about, so employers are less likely to grant such a request unless it's already commonplace. However, an employeer might be able to feel more comfortable with a "time off for relocation" or "time off for education" arrangement.

• An employeer may not be able to offer more pay based on your experience and their pay structure. But a performance bonus of some sort, or even a pre-arranged schedule for salary review may help you to get more money down the road, earlier than if you don't pre-arrange a salary review schedule. For example, an employer may be willing to agree to review your salary after 3 months instead of after six, with the hope of being able to bring your salary up based on your demonstrated performance.

• An employer may not be able to offer a signing bonus, but may be able to draw some form of relocation reimbursement from a different pool that gets in under the wire.

My point is that the art of negotiation involves trying to figure out where the person on the other side of the table may have wiggle room. At the same time, that person will be trying to discover where you have wiggle room. Maybe you can settle for a little less pay than you're hoping for, but maybe the employer has a little room to work with you in some other area.

The objective isn't only to get the largest piece of pie by percentage, it's to find additional ingredients to add to the pie to make the total pie bigger so the servings are more substantial. Keep an open mind an think outside the box.