"My own experience with JS is that it's not a very well designed language. You only like it because it gives you functionality you want, not because it is inherently a good thing on it's own. If somehow Perl or Brainfuck were the client side language-of-choice, you wouldn't care one whit for JS."
Yes, that's true.
I would add just one important detail. The precise reason why I love JS is not just because it gives me the functionality but it gives me the functionality ON ALL DEVICES. It's not enough to have another language that is better or gives more functionality than JS.
What makes JavaScript supreme is that it runs on all devices. Pick any device. The oldest smartphone I have from the stone age can run JavaScript. I remember, even Windows 95 had JavaScript running in the web browser. So, that's what makes it stand out. If you know how to program in JavaScript, you can program anything. Even smartwatches run JavaScript. Tesla's model S cars have a big screen with a web browser that runs JavaScript. Some refrigerators now come equipped with a computer screen and web browser which runs JavaScript. That's why why JS rules.
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