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Fix Perl quick or else.

by rir (Vicar)
on Mar 18, 2003 at 23:18 UTC ( [id://244183]=perlmeditation: print w/replies, xml ) Need Help??

Or You Can Make a Living with Perl   (Rocky & Bullwinkle style alternate title)

Update: Don't take life too seriously. Or this post.

Perl6 is not too complicated!

What about the still missing dwimy operators the ones for people that don't know if they got numbers or strings:

g= e= l= n= >t <t
And if they don't dwym they should be overrideable. I mean maybe  "one" e= 1 should be true sometimes. The locale issues can be shoved back on the OS people, they love little challanges like these. Then people won't worry about eq vs. == they'll just have l< instead of <t problems.

Also what with this wimpy BEGIN CHECK etc. stuff! And where is that going anyway? There should not be just a few named and one nameless phase of execution. I propose

BEGIN 1 BEGIN 70 BEGIN CHECK CHECK 87

urgently before Perl 78 has:

PRESTART REDEFINE_THE_UNIVERSE START INIT COMMENCE BEGIN CHECK RECHECK VERIFY MAKE_SURE DOUBLE_CHECK JUDGEMENT_DAY DAHA TTRH

and all the FAQs that go with those. Like:

SECTION CCLXXVII -- Execution Sequence: The Bory Details.

What is DAHA?

First DAHA is not an acronym, this was Larry XC's first utterance. But use the mnemonic "Decide After Heaven's Attained" to remember where this phase of Perl execution comes after JUDGEMENT_DAY.

What is TTRH?

TTRH is the only acronym in Perl. It is a phase of execution, it stands for "Time to redesign heaven". The persistent rumors that TTRH comes the crotch-seam-ripping noise that overrode some word in Larry IIC's Prefuturist Valentine's Day Monologue Given On May Day should be discounted.

TTRH! Has the real Wall blood been lost some time in the last eighty generations?

That is not a polite question. Like we said TTRH is an acronym.

Then what about y?

Y is not a one word acronym. According to Oxford-Warner-O'Reilly-Websters Perldoc Unabridged what you may think of as one word acronyms are really abbreviations.

Do I really need to know this FAQ stuff?

Yes, it is impossible to properly program in a language without understanding the mindset of the programmers of the language.

Does that mean it is impossible to properly program?

Bingo!

Why didn't you just say so?

It's a living.

Replies are listed 'Best First'.
Re: Fix Perl quick or else.
by ibanix (Hermit) on Mar 19, 2003 at 01:25 UTC
    I downvoted this node because I can not tell if it is:

    * A troll
    * A joke
    * Sarcasm
    * All of the above

    And becuase the author didn't explain clearly what he was talking about.

    Update: If you've got an issue with that, why not hit 'reply' and tell me why?

    $ echo '$0 & $0 &' > foo; chmod a+x foo; foo;

      rir has been a positive contributor to the Monastery and as such deserves the benefit of the doubt. I read the post as a bit of humor, and frankly I got a chuckle from it.


      "The dead do not recognize context" -- Kai, Lexx
        "has been a positive contributor to the Monastery "... yeah, but the fact still remains that the post is unclear.

        I too cannot tell if it is an attempt at humor, or something else (serious).

        I too would like to know: is it humor or what (it's confusing and unclear; if it's humor, i'd like to know so I can disregard it completely)?


        MJD says you can't just make shit up and expect the computer to know what you mean, retardo!
        I run a Win32 PPM repository for perl 5.6x+5.8x. I take requests.
        ** The Third rule of perl club is a statement of fact: pod is sexy.

      A joke. I thought anyone who stayed with the post until JUDGEMENT_DAY would see that as over the top. I figured I lose some before that.

      Fear not you differently humoured folk, I post such fancies seldom.

      I thought the  e= operator was obviously the merging of the == and the eq operators. Thanks, I've updated the node per your critcism.

      I don't have an issue with your downvote. Although I tend towards contrariety, occasionally I do talk to people with whom I agree. You vote your votes as you think best. Thanks for the feedback.

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