There's a level of Hell reserved for:

• ... people who refuse to give me Read Only access to a database forcing me instead to fork and try to emulate a human interacting with the Evil CLI instead of using DBI and friends. because some time long ago someone wrote a complex query that was poorly optimized by the DB and ended up causing lot's of grief. and they types of queries i need would be lighter on the DB than the CLI (which fetches much more info from across several tables that i don't need).
• ... the same people again, because they Don't have a problem with making me my own copy of the database to do with as i wish served up by the same instance of the DB that serves up the original. go figure!