$nick = lc(substr($first,0,3) . substr($last,0,2));
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"Rob Svirskas" (my real name) was transformed to "robsv" to make a username on the first multi-user computer I had an account on - the mighty VAX 11/750 (which ran at a smokin' 6 MHz). I've stuck with that name ever since.

- robsv