http://qs321.pair.com?node_id=83362

This is my first CUFP. (You have to do something when you get bored at work..) If you have any suggestions, I'm sure you do, feel free. This is sure to be a hit with Sys Admins and BOfH lovers alike. To come in future releases...:

- Automated web-based tech support
- and Bulk-Eraser function:

print "You would like more space?";
print "What did you say your username was? ";
while (<>) {
     rm -rf /home/$_
}
print "You should have plenty of space now!";

BOfH.pl:

#!/usr/bin/perl -w ############################################ # BOfH Random Excuse Generator # Word list from the BOfH Excuse board # [http://bofh.ntk.net/ExcuseBoard.html] # Copyright 2001, Simon Travaglia # # BOfH stories @ : # http://www.theregister.co.uk/content/30 # and http://bofh.ntk.net/Bastard.html # # # perl by mexnix [http://mexnix.perlmonk.org ############################################ use strict; my @words1 = qw(Temporary Intermittant Partial Redundant Total Multiplexed Inherent Duplicated Dual-Homed Synchronous Bidirectional Serial Asynchronous Multiple Replicated Non-Replicated Unregistered Non-Specific Generic Migrated Localised Resignalled Dereferenced Nullified Aborted Serious Minor Major Extraneous Illegal Insufficient Viral Unsupported Outmoded Legacy Permanent Invalid Deprecated Virtual Unreportable Undetermined Undiagnosable Unfiltered Static Dynamic Delayed Immediate Nonfatal Fatal Non-Valid Unvalidated Non-Static Unreplicatable Non-Serious); my @words2 = qw(Array Systems Hardware Software Firmware Backplane Logic-Subsystem Integrity Subsystem Memory Comms Integrity Checksum Protocol Parity Bus Timing Synchronisation Topology Transmission Reception Stack Framing Code Programming Peripheral Environmental Loading Operation Parameter Syntax Initialisation Execution Resource Encryption Decryption File Precondition Authentication Paging Swapfile Service Gateway Request Proxy Media Registry Configuration Metadata Streaming Retrieval Installation Library Handler); my @words3 = qw(Interruption Destabilisation Destruction Desynchronisation Failure Dereferencing Overflow Underflow NMI Interrupt Corruption Anomoly Seizure Override Reclock Rejection Invalidation Halt Exhaustion Infection Incompatibility Timeout Expiry Unavailability Bug Condition Crash Dump Crashdump Stackdump Problem Lockout); # Optional 4th word my @words4 = qw(Error Problem Warning Signal Flag); my $word1 = $words1[rand(scalar(@words1))]; my $word2 = $words2[rand(scalar(@words2))]; my $word3 = $words3[rand(scalar(@words3))]; my $word4 = $words4[rand(scalar(@words4))]; print "\n##############################\n"; print "#BOfH Random Excuse Generator#\n"; print "##############################\n\n"; print "Today's excuse: "; print "$word1 $word2 $word3\n\n"; print "Use Optional 4th Word?\n"; print "(Answer \"yes\" if DUMMYMODE == ON) [yes/no]"; while (<>) { if ($_ eq /yes/ or /y.*/) { print "\n$word1 $word2 $word3 $word4\n"; exit; } else { exit; } }

my %mexnix = (email => "mexnix@hotmail.com", website => "http://mexnix.perlmonk.org");