this seems a perfect case for a Schwartzian Transform:

@event_queue =
    map { $_->[0] }
    sort { $a->[1] <=> $b->[1] }
    map { [$_, split /\t/, $_, 1] }
    @event_queue;
[download]

cheers,
Aldo

King of Laziness, Wizard of Impatience, Lord of Hubris